You didn't think it would be something else....

WHEN PIGS FLY!

That's probably what you think when you think about catching swine flu. Today the doctor told me I had this. Although, I know it will soon be over, due to my Husband's waining interest in being a waitress, maid, masseuse, and cook. He's done a great job and like all great wives I've kept a tally in my head of everything he did. This way when he gets sick I know exactly how much I'm in for. That's how it works around here. Because Rowan is now also sick and scheduled to see the doctor tomorrow. And a person can only deal with so much hacking, coughing, neediness, and medicine before they lose their mind and say "can't it wait I'm trying to watch Seinfeld!"

ME IN THE HOUSE OF HORRORS

When I went to see the doctor I was apparently so hideous and grotesque they made me wear this mask. There were children in the room after all. I must have looked like a zombie bag lady because I wore a long brown skirt, a questionably ironed shirt, flip flops (pretty painted toes), and my big Mom purse. I added this mask and my own personal box of Puff's to carry with me. Now you get the picture?

I really didn't want to wear the mask at the grocery store because people stare, but I had to get some hey-it's-really-obvious-I'm-sick food. I got Sprite, crackers, soup, bananas, bread, Tylenol, and a big bottle of Jack Daniels. kidding

I didn't want to wear my mask because of this one lecherous species in the grocery store which we'll call The College Student. I used to be one. But now I'm not. But I'm surrounded by them when I go in this store. All the customers and all the workers are College Students. I'm wondering, "how much beer can these people drink? And it's not even good beer."

So in my evil way I could have turned and coughed all over that yappity chick's Box-O-Wine and ruined her upcoming weekend. But I didn't. So now I get to be The Matyr of the Day.