Wednesday, May 18, 2011

All Raptured Up

I know it's been awhile since my last post.  Nothing has really compelled me to blog.  Until...word broke out on the Facebook about Rapture 2011. 

This got me thinking.  What is the proper etiquette for such an event?

Sara is wondering if she needs to clean her floors.  Now I'm wondering if I should do that, too.  What else am I missing?
  • Do I leave out a plate of cookies and a glass of milk the night before?

  • If I'm not chosen, do I get coal in my stocking?

  • What's the right Rapture outfit?

  • Are there any Rapture sales going on at the mall? 

  • Did Kate and Will get married before the Rapture on purpose?

  • I want to go to this craft show on Saturday and it doesn't end till 7 p.m. but the Rapture is supposed to happen at 6 p.m.

  • Is it 6 p.m. Eastern time or Pacific?  Because if it's Eastern then I can stay for the whole craft show. 

  • If it's Eastern time, is it fair for people in California to have a heads up warning?

  • Should I have a pinata at my Rapture party?

  • What's the perfect Rapture gift for that person who has everything?

Maybe you've picked up on my sarcasm and that just maybe I don't believe this will be happening.  I have a few reasons why I believe to not believe.

  • The remodel isn't done yet.  If I do get Raptured up I'll be in serious insurance hell for not finishing it.

  • I'm scheduled to work the following day and I don't get that lucky to think I'll be getting out of going to work.  If any of my coworkers get the Rapture I'm gonna be so mad because it'll leave more work for me.

  • I don't think there's enough Prozac in existence for dealing with millions of people disappearing.  

So if the Rapture does come then I hope you enjoyed this last post and it was nice knowing you.  If it doesn't come then we'll move on to some captivating posts about gardening.